It’s a little over two weeks until Halloween weekend, and some of you (like me) are probably still sitting on the fence regarding whether or not you’re going to be participating in the cultural nightmare that is Halloween, I have some easy costumes for your consideration.
1. American Hero
Represent the United States and the nihilism that comes with being a citizen of this fine country by dressing as a proud son of our nation. Hide your face behind the feathers of freedom and protect yourself from disappointment with Captain America’s invulnerable shield. If you play beer pong, take every shot; TJ Oshie would.
2. Angry Millennial
Take Team North America’s aesthetic to its logical conclusion and represent the angst of the millennial who identifies a little too much with Kylo Ren. Take your frustrations out on a console on Starkiller base when your team doesn’t make the cut due to a tiebreaker in the standings.
3. Good Riddance Montreal
Canadiens fans will be cry, cry, cry-ing when you strut out in your PK shirsey and cowboy hat. Add a pair of cowboy boots and a guitar to take your costume to the next level.
4. The Patron Saint of Toronto
Toronto has a new hero and that hero is named Auston. Who wasn’t sitting there, rapt with joy, as Auston Matthews potted four goals in his debut? Show that you’ve been touched by greatness with a Matthews shirt and a shiny halo.
5. Wonder Woman
Dress as the most powerful woman on earth in hockey pants, a Wonder Woman unitard, and a Riveters hat. Add a cape with KESSEL 28 on the back or, if you were lucky enough to get one of the limited edition #BESTKESSEL shirts, turn that into a cape to rep your alter ego.
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